What I really want

I've spent time over the last couple of months formulating a list of the qualities and specifications for anyone I may date, and ultimately my spouse. Warning- some are superficial, some practical, and some downright demanding. Sexually explicit content is included. Also...these are in no particular order.

1. You must love to dance, added to my list of things which truly make me happy is dancing. If you won't take me out dancing, and dance with me, I won't know what to do with you.
2. Play golf- I'm not saying you have to be an expert, but I love to get up on the weekends and go to the golf course.
3. Have a job, which provides enough income to pay for yourself, your hobbies and your car.
4. Own a car, preferably nicer than mine- not for status but for responsibility.
5. Own a house, condo, loft- anything. It doesn't have to be fancy, but you displaying ownership of something means you have some sense of responsibility and sensibility.
6. Think recycling is important.
7. You will embrace the fact (and maybe even crack the eggs) that I bake an exorbitant amount of zucchini bread every February for Ayyam-i-Ha.
8. Can you please match my enthusiasm for the little things in life, the little victories.
9. Have your own relationship with God, whatever that may be. Know and believe in a higher power.
10. You must love to travel and have no prejudice as to where or when.
11. Have a general attitude of "whatever, whenever, however."
12. Know and understand that my birthday is the one day that I actually focus on me- I love my one day and want to be pampered to the max.
13. Self govern your comments and your emotions, I am not responsible for your outbursts, nor will I engage in a battle in an attempt to correct you.
14. Know when to say "I'm sorry"- it doesn't make you less of a man to admit your mistakes, and I ultimately will respect you more.
15. Respect my body like the house of the soul that it is. If you just need a place to put your penis, please go elsewhere.
16. You will want children, preferably 3.
17. You will love the fact that I treat every household occurrence such as birthday parties, vacations and in-law visits like an event, and there may be a folder associated with it on my desk.
18. Do not criticize my cooking, if you don't like it too bad, eat it anyway and cook yourself the next night. I, in turn, will never criticize yours.
19. Please have friends of your own, and have hobbies and activities independent of me, as I would like to do the same.
20. I subscribe to Martha Stewart Magazine, please don't hate.
21. I will be a stay at home mom, I'm looking forward to the bounty. Call me traditional, but motherhood is the most important job on the planet and you will do everything you can to make sure I can be around during our kids' early years.
22. I am sick, and at times will need to be taken care of.
23. I choose to have one tv in the house, and almost never turn it on. I would rather read, write and interact with one another than watch tv.
24. You would rather eat at the hole in the wall Thai place down the road than have grilled chicken and mashed potatoes.
25. I smoke cigars occasionally, it would be fun to smoke them together.
26. Back me up, no matter what. We are a team and I will need your support.
27. Be appreciative of all that I do for you, because I will go to the ends of the earth in order to make you happy. Please work thank you into your daily vocabulary.
28. Help me create a 100% honest environment. I need to feel safe saying what I need to say, when I need to say it.
29. Please play cards, I love to have friends over to play Pinochle and Spades or even Poker.
30. I like to watch baseball and golf- I know it's strange. I will watch football with you if you watch baseball with me.