Working Late

I cannot complain. I have not worked nearly the long hours this year that I did last year. In part due to the fact that this is my "second rodeo" aka my second year here and I'm an ol' pro at this point. I volunteered to work late tonight, as I had no real plans and the extra cash can't hurt.

So what have I been doing? Babysitting clients of course. The rules state that if a client is in the Conference Center, someone from my staff has to be here. I think I have done 1 hour of actual work and the rest of the time have been doing this...as you see, I've posted 8 blog entries in the last 12 hours. Feel free to take it in stride. Break it up for ongoing entertainment, as you know I may not post anything for another month. I've decided I'm a blog binger. I think all the time "oh, I need to blog about that" ... and then I don't... and then I have a day like today where there is absolutely nothing for me to do and so I binge.

I've also been applying for jobs all over- the Ritz, Four Seasons and Country Clubs--mainly in St. Louis, Denver, New Orleans and Dubai. I'm keeping my fingers crossed, I need to get out of here.

Let's see, I caught up on a bunch of phone calls--like to my parents, cousin, a couple of friends. I left messages on a whole bunch of people's Facebook pages and looked at everyone's recently uploaded photos. I bought a plane ticket to go to Michigan for Ayyam-i-Ha in February. Read everyone's blogs. Paid bills. Chatted with J!

In response to Steph's entry-- here are all of the divine White Elephant Gifts I have received this holiday season:


(From the left- ceramic moose luminary, which heats up to unreasonable temperatures that may burn your hands, a travel alarm clock circa 1968 and a change jar which says "Retirement Fund")

It is now almost midnight and I'm still here. Call this blog entry #10 for the day.

Texting your way to love

If you have not seen this video and you are single and on the dating scene you will appreciate it. If you are not, you may think it's funny, but you may not be able to relate.

A truly phenomenal lady

I received this text message late last night:

"Kathy's condition has become more serious. Andy is coming home from changing times. please keep her in your prayers."

I was devastated. This lady saved my life.

I was told by her dear friend 3 years ago that I had 2 choices for my marriage. One- I could stick it out for the next three years and leave with nothing of myself, or two- get out now and save what was left of me.

It was Kathy who gave me the strength to stand up and say that I will no longer live as I was living and would no longer be taken for granted, or accused of cheating or be cursed for taking a pay cut, or work and take care of the household and nurture our relationships and every other aspect of our life together. It was she who gave me the tools to survive what could have been a potentially traumatic event.

I owe you my life.

A voicemail saved is a voicemail loved

I save voice mails on a regular basis. Sometimes because they make me happy or because they let me hear the voices of the people I love the most. Here are the ones currently saved that I listen to almost daily.

Marabeth left a voicemail after my birthday singing her classic happy birthday song, not the traditional birthday song, but her own. She has the voice of an angel, which literally makes me cry each and every time I hear it. I save it so that if I need to hear her sweet voice I can at any time.

Golriz left a message for me back in June, which I still listen to with regularity. It goes like this: "Jen, I want you to save this message and listen to it whenever you are having doubts about your future line of action. Life on the other side is so beautiful. Life with a person who treats you right and nurtures you and respects you and knows you and cares about who the person is to the core of their being is just the most beautiful thing ever."

I save every voicemail that Double B's leaves me, which are far and few between. They basically say "Hello, just calling to say hi. I'll give you a call another day. I hope everything is going well." But hearing his voice melts me every time. And so I continue to save and re-listen. I only hope he saved the message I left him just days ago when it was snowing here.

Speaking of the day it was snowing...Cherie left me a message that day so filled with excitement that I don't even think a page of exclamation points would do it justice. "Freaky can you even believe how fun this is?! OMG I'm so excited!! This is so fun!!!!" Cherie and I have a mad love for snow and the fact that it was snowing in Houston last week was a miracle for the both of us.

The first sighting

It was no coincidence that you were there. You acted as if it was, but I know you were expecting the call any day with sighting of me. I didn't feel awkward at all, but I did not know what to say. I have been fully removed from you for 8 months now. I felt almost no emotion, just as if I was seeing an old acquaintance. I was actually glad to see you, but not enough to linger all night long. I have, of course, thought of you almost every moment since then--evaluating if I could do it again, if I wanted to be with you again, if I could let you back in. And I realized two things. The first is that the changes which would have to occur are quite monumental and beyond what you are capable of at this time. The second is that I am truly happy.

J is for Tattoo

This time of my life is marked forever



*Disclaimer- photo taken with camera phone + tattoo still healing = fuzzy blurry photo

And in the end.

Sunday came and went almost in silence. I'm not sure what I thought would happen, but nothing did. I got up, went running, grabbed some lunch with a friend, hung out, watched TV...nothing monumental. You didn't call, I didn't call. I'm not sure you even realized what day it was.

I have not thought of you much over the last year, but I thought of you today. I hope you are well and happy. I hope you are at peace. And I want nothing but the very best for the rest of your life.